Saturday, December 8, 2007

I Can Do Better Than That...

I Can Do Better Than That...

Do you ever just read something or watch something on TV or see a movie and just say to yourself, "I can write better than that"?

I think part of the frustration is knowing that I'm sitting through a crappy movi
e when I could be home working on the next masterpiece. Or reading a book that makes no sense and uses awkward prose. It's like the author just mails it in. Do people really not care about the quality of their work, or is there so little good material out there that people will just film anything?

Here's an example: If you ever start thinking "Hey, what if my Main Character had an evil twin--" STOP!
The Evil Twin paradigm has been done to death. Yes, we all understand the yin-yang dichotomy of the modern intellect, but please...putting a goatee on someone and calling them evil doesn't fly any more.
No clones, twins, brothers, yourself from the future/past, a ghost of yourself, yourself from Dimension X, yourself as the opposite sex, the you that "should" have been, transporter accidents, lightning bolts, whatever. Enough is enough!

And for God's sake...enough of Vampires and Zombies! Repeat after me: DONE TO DEATH! Do you know what "done to death" means? That I'd rather die than watch or read another uncreative author/writer's take on vampires and zombies! ENOUGH!!
Create some other kind of monster already! Even the frickin Cookie Monster would be better. Imagine a thousand rabid muppets stalking you, wanting to eat your cookies. You would freak the hell out, beatch! Look at those googly eyes, and the deep cavernous throat. This SOB can pack a whole 10lb sack of Famous Amos before you even knew he was in the room. Look at the maw on this mother!

Come on folks, I know you can do better. No, wait...I can do you'd better get your shit together because I'm coming after you!

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